About Me

The Blog Commandments

  1. I blog for fun, profit and the gals – two of which are non-existent.
  2. I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, unless persuaded by a lot of money (see rule #1).
  3. I will only respond to PR requests if it ends with “pretty please”.
  4. I expect no one else to blog except me. It only makes sense to have a monopolistic blog writing about a monopolistic company. You don’t want to break the universe do you?

About Me

I’m a person and stuff. Mostly person, sometimes stuff. Here’s a few questions that I would ask myself if I was speaking to myself in the third person, not that I do that often, but this is what would happen if I was forced to.

Tell me about yourself

I am technophobic. Technology scares me. Every time I see a computer, my legs shake. I try to avoid technology whenever possible, and I publish this very blog from a typewriter and telegraph. STOP.

Are you honest and unbiased?

No. Inquire today about my competitive rates for biased opinions and reviews, discounts available for bulk purchases.

The posts on this blog are provided ‘AS IS’ with no warranties, and confer no rights. The opinions expressed herein are my own personal opinions and do not represent my employer’s view, my window’s view – or the view from some place very high in any way.

Contacting Me

Whether you’re a multi-million dollar company and would like to send exciting products for review, a prince who has recently inherited great wealth, or even someone with a tip or interesting information, feel free to email me at ________@_____.___.

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